Being with Pain. is messy. gut-wrenching.

one is bound to move forever forward with the muck and the mire stuck to the soles of the feet. with wails and laments wedged where mind, heart, soul and strength meet.

Most especially if Pain does not pass. while God wills it. to last.

Pain is not my friend, but I am hers. I do not wish to be with her, but she remains with me. Won’t leave me alone, though I try to shut the door in her face, pretend she is not there, take alternate routes, fly like a dove to another branch. But no matter. She is at my side. I have no where left to hide. Like the waves along the shore, she washes up beside. Sinking down deep in my sand to abide in my land. No, Pain does not by me pass. while God wills it. to last.

Read with Reason, the end of the book of Job brings little relief to the one who must be with Pain.

When Reason reads the end of the book of Job, there’s really no happy ending. Reason reads that Job’s Pain is assuaged. With a new family. New wealth. And reconciliation with all those around him. This offers little comfort and additionally increases Pains power when there’s no happy ending in store for the one stuck with a thorn in the side. And then, Reason also remembers… Job’s losses. New families do not wipe away the memory of those lost. Reconciliation does not erase, fully, injuries suffered in the past. Reason sees the traces of the muck and the mire on the soles of Job’s feet. Hears the echoes of the laments and the wails where mind, heart, soul and strength still meet.

Reason’s Pain is not assuaged with the ending of the book of Job.

But Faith’s is.

Faith hears a new story, sings a new song. Writes a new ending from a new beginning. By Grace. Through Faith. In her Groom.

The Suffering Servant.

Who’s hands and feet have scars that do not transpire. of the muck and the mire.

Who’s heart is still wrenched. by the wails and laments.

Reason hides Job’s Pain in a new box, wrapped up with fancy paper and tied off with a shiny ribbon. Reason hides Christ in the grave and ties Him up in heaven, where He is of no use to those of us being with Pain in the land of the living.

But see. Faith hears a new story: the journey of the Church here in the land of the living, passing through the sea of Sheol, by the means of Grace: The Word. And the Sacraments, Baptism and Communion. That enable us to be with Pain that does not pass. while God wills it to last.

My friend, Pain, has blessed me to proclaim,

with Job,

both of us still wrapped in our old blue robe…

“I had heard of you by the hearing of the ear,

but now my eye sees you;”

It is my intention, my desire, to help others, perhaps you, see what i now see with my ears in the end of the book of Job. i can only promise that it will be, like my time abiding with Pain, messy. I am not Theologian, and do not write like one. But i am being made a little theologian. of the Cross. From a long time with my friend, Pain. Who has bared for me the beauty of Christ. And His Church.

Over the next series of blogs, I will attempt only to write like an infant theologian of the cross as i say…

“therefore i despise myself,

and repent in dust and ashes.”

So if Pain has become your unwelcome yet abiding friend… join me, if you will, on a new ending to the book of Job… that is gut-wrenching. as it turns the stomach of the Word upside down - so that out will pour Christ. with Us. in the dust and the ash. while God wills it to last.

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